Your message and other things you say

Sitting in a hotel reading the instructions for “complimentary high-speed wireless internet service”.

Seven steps, easy enough.  Then there’s another step listed after an asterisk (even though there is no asterisk anywhere else on the page).  The step says: “If you do not have a wireless card built in to your computer, we provide External Wireless Bridge Packs at no cost which can be rented for the full length of your stay.”

My dictionary uses the word ‘payment’ in every one of its definitions.  I wonder how much this no cost solution will run me?

Don’t use double meanings.  Oh, and proofread.