Your message and other things you say

My good buddy Jeff blogged about and I commented on Um and Uhs the other day.  Low and behold, the question comes up in class today:

“Alan, I see the value in eliminating non-words, and I see how to do it. But if I let one or a few slip, wouldn’t that be OK. I mean, we didn’t even notice our classmates and they had more than a few.“

That’s a loaded question.  Of course the world won’t stop when a speaker utters a non-word.  But once we’ve decided they are OK, then the question becomes, “How many is OK?”  Perfection is possibly unreachable.  So why get hung up on it?

• The best hitters do occasionally (often?) strike out.
• The best Christians do occasionally (often?) sin (much to the delight of the athiests) — (Romans 6:1 seems to think this isn’t OK)
• The best athiests do occasionally (often?) find themselves in an logical loop (much to the delight of the religious).
• The best drivers do occasionally cut people off
• The best speakers do occasionally utter words that have little or no meaning, or worse

But in each case, those that want to be the best share a common trait — they want perfection, even if they realistically do not think it will ever come.

Once we’ve decided that it’s OK, then there really isn’t anything to motivate us to get better.

Don’t tolerate habits that lead to ineffectual communication.

Watched a presenter last week open (first slide and everything) with “Well, let’s tell you what this seminar is NOT about” and proceeded to go through a pretty comprehensive list of what he would NOT cover. 

We all have things we don’t intend to cover, would prefer not to cover, and will never cover in our talks.  It’s better not to lead with exposing those things, though.

Leading with the negative:

• Sets a negative tone for the talk
• Draws attention to things that might have gone unnoticed
• Gives the audience an impression we don’t desire discussion
• Takes the focus OFF the things we WANT to cover

Yes, caveats do head some things off at the pass, and if those things are pink elephants (everyone notices but no one wants to talk about it), we can garner some brownie points for addressing it head on.  But most of the time, it only serves to make our audience mad.  Far better to give them an idea of what they WILL get and give them a reason to listen.

Open with positive, motivating reasons to pay attention.

Presenter with PowerPoint (common).  Presenter wants to move around a bit (!) and wants to have a visual to support his/her point (!) and doesn’t want to be blinded (!).  So far so good.

Only now we have an issue with how to transition through The Beam Of Light.

Best solution?  Don’t.  Stay out of the beam.  There are a couple of reasons that we, the presenter, want to stay out of the projector’s beam.  First, it is distracting.  The extremely strong light of the projector contrasts mightily with the ambient light of the room, and we need nothing more than a photograph to tell us that the contrast makes for distracting viewing.  Second, there is likely to be a “flash” as we cause an eclipse of the presentation, assuming we have anything bright in our slides.  Most importantly, we are confusing our audience.  They don’t know whether they should watch the presenter or the slides.

I saw a presenter a few weeks ago who was close to solving the problem.  Since the room had an overhead projector and the presenter was not tall, there was just a few inches of intersection between the projected slides and the path that she took across the room.  I couldn’t figure out why the slides so consistently displayed on her forehead.  Most of the time any text missed the actual presenter, but once the number 38 was clearly emblazoned across her forehead.  For about 90 seconds.  Long enough that people noticed.

As I tried to see why the bright light seemed to accentuate her forehead, I realized that she was moving forward until the light was out of HER eyes.  The bottom of the slide would usually be just above her eyebrows, and she felt that since she could see clearly, it must be OK for the audience as well.  That clearly is a violation of Rule #1, but it takes a walk-through to know where in the room we can roam and still stay out of the PowerPoint slides.  Make that walkthrough.

Stay out of your PowerPoint projection.

I’ve seen a rash of presentations in recent days that have recycled PowerPoint slides.  The mere fact that I know this is a problem.  But it usually manifests itself in words as well as the faulty visual.  Some examples:

• Presentation date wrong
• Presentation group or place wrong
• Times on slides (break at 2:15!)
• Custom information that doesn’t apply

It’s been accompanied with quotes like:

• “Well, the last time I taught this I guess we took a break at 2:15“
• “I guess you can tell we’re not at the San Diego Chamber of Commerce.“
• “I thought I had changed this slide.  I meant to.“

When you don’t take the time to make changes to your slides EVERY TIME you present, you tell the audience:

• You are exactly like my previous group (or at least I think you are)
• I didn’t care enough about you to work at this
• This show will go exactly like all the others

I can’t imagine why a presenter would ever publish a time beforehand in a PPT slide, but even if you have a reason for that, you MUST change it.  If there are slides in your PPT that need altering each time, might I suggest making a hidden slide that indexes ALL the changes you need to make, then consult that slide (or note, if you prefer, on the title slide) before you hit the stage.

As an aside, a presenter should strive to make something custom in every presentation, so figure out what you can use that is unique to that audience.

Make sure all references to previous shows are OUT of your PowerPoint.

A girl was flirting with a boy.  This went on for several weeks.  The girl found out the boy was seeing someone else.  She got red-hot mad and told her friend about it.  “But I thought you told me he wasn’t your type and you wouldn’t go out with him,” the friend queried.  “I wouldn’t,” the girl replied, “but I wanted him to at least ask me.“

That has been my experience with a major retailer of late.

Office supply store.  Let’s name it after paper fasteners, say, Paper Clips.

Paper Clips sends me, as a “valued customer”, an advertisement that entices me to buy.  With free delivery, I push the button and and my new printer is on its way.  The rebate offer is against my basic principles of shopping, but it really is a great deal.  Or so I think.

A few days later the printer arrives.  Only it’s not the right printer.  Not even made by the same company.  The UPS label says one thing, the box another.  So the $8/hr droid at the warehouse goofed up — I can accept that.  The printer they send me is worth 2x what the original one was worth before the half-off rebate.  I call up Paper Clips and inform them of the error.  “I’m happy to keep this one,” says I, smiling.  “You want me to charge you the difference then?” says they.  “No,” says I, “you can take it back.“  They offer to come and get it — in a week when I’ll be out of the country.  What are my other options?  Return it to the store. 

So I go to the local store, where it takes them 30 minutes to basically cancel my order.  What they (the floor sales droid and the manager) argue about is how their inventory system is going to handle this.  In front of me.  Finally, I get a credit to my card.  Whew.

Three weeks later, I get my rebate in the mail, in the form of a prepaid VISA card.  Amazing how their system works — apparently I can make a handsome living ordering things and filing an online rebate, then taking the item back locally.  Since thee $100 rebate isn’t mine, I take it  back to the store.  The customer service person immediately hollers, “Mike!” when I explain the situation, and Mike the Manager comes over to solve my problems and provide me service.

When he hears the story, he says, “I would have just kept the card.“ 

“But it’s not my money,” says I. 

“Well, can I have it?” he says, followed by “Just kidding.”  I don’t know whether or not to believe him.  I inform him that there are some holes in their process and I’d expect they wanted to know about it.  He says thanks and takes my card, and assures me he’s taking it to the shredder right away.

As I walk out of the store, he yells over his shoulder, “Thanks for being honest.“ 

Paper Clips is the third closest office supply store to my house.  They have prices that are sometimes better, but not always.  In this business climate, they need loyal customers to choose them over their competitor. 

I didn’t expect anything from them.  But I did expect them to offer.  They have failed to win a customer.

Don’t discuss internal problems in front of a customer.  Make offers to keep customers if you make a mistake.  Make offers to keep customers even if you do everything right.

In two words: They Change

We tend to be myopic in our views of our future.  We often cannot imagine the opportunities before us.  Therefore we aim for our best guess at the future, and it is almost never right.  Just ask a 4-year-old, or an 8-year-old, or an 18-year-old, or a 30-year-old what they want to be when they grow up.  Even if we are part of the distinct minority and nail it, we can’t imagine the path we take to get there.

In my line of work — training — I have met only ONE person who said they set out with the career goal of being a “trainer”.  I’ve met a TON of folks (like myself) who discovered training quite by accident and LOVE it.  Many go back and get additional education, but there are precious few (none?!) undergraduate programs in adult education and training.  The graduate world is full of them.  This is proof positive that training is a discovered career and requires a course correction to find.

Many people and companies hold to their goals as if they are immovable objects.  This is set for failure, because the situations those goals were established under change.  We must change with them.  Not achieving a goal is not failure.  Not setting them sure and holding to them when they need to be changed sure is.

A corollary to this issue is that we aim too low.  C.S. Lewis says:

We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

I am first in line guilty of this sort of thinking, and it’s hard to change.  I recently chatted with a friend who has a great idea, great talent, and a great future.  His comment was of the sort, “I don’t think I’ll make any money from this, but I want to do it.“  That’s a great mindset and I applaud the freedom from the tyranny of materialism, but I personally think he has a great business opportunity and if he even half looked for it, there would be a great living to be made in it.  That doesn’t mean he should set a goal to make lots of money, to be sure, but it is extremely limiting to remove that possibility from the goal at the outset.

Set lofty goals, re-evaluate them, and change them, as necessary.

Been giving a bit of thought and discussion lately to gurus. 

From Webster:

1. a teacher and especially intellectual guide in matters of fundamental concern
2. one who is an acknowledged leader or chief proponent 
3. a person with knowledge or expertise 

I think we tend to believe that people who meet condition (3) are gurus, but forget the all-important elements of (1) and (2).  Gurudom doesn’t come from within.  One cannot proclaim themself a guru.  One CAN develop knowledge and expertise on their own.

Let’s take them in reverse order.  In this down economy, NOW is the time to develop skills that are
valuable.  For some folks, getting laid off is the only way they’ll
have the time (or inclination) to devote to learning something new.  Or
become a true master at something they know OK.  Take the opportunity
– even if you AREN’T fortunate enough to get laid off — to become an
expert in something.

Then there’s the little matter of becoming recognized for your
expertise.  That comes from being seen.  Take the opportunity to talk. 
Write up your notes and thoughts.  Start a blog (it’s so easy even a
communications coach can do it).  Soon, you’ll get talked about and
asked for by name.  The circle doesn’t have to be big — you don’t need
an infomercial or TV interview.  A simple drive-by question from a
co-worker qualifies.  When you are being asked questions, you are well
on your way to becoming a guruologist (unless the question is something like, “Where the heck have you been all day?  You don’t answer your email or phone and your car wasn’t in the parking lot!“).

Lastly, one of the phenomenons I’ve noticed in corporate America is the tendency to keep information.  Apparently, with ‘rightsizing’ rampant and pending job doom and gloom everywhere you read, the average employee believes that anything he can keep to himself makes him more valuable to the organization.  Nothing is further from the truth.  By sharing information, others are aware of what you know.  This also frees the employee from the mundane information to go seek out something else to become a guru about.  Sharing information makes an employee MORE valuable, not less.  A guru is a TEACHER. 

Learn.  Be seen.  Share.  Be a guru.

I often have students — usually experienced ones — who take issue with a point I might make or a methodology I prescribe.  Since I’m in the business of changing behavior, by very definition I am trying to get folks to do things differently.  Some folks apparently don’t like different.

It’s at those moments where the status quo meets the “You want me to do WHAT?” that we find out a lot about ourselves.  Those who have tasted success and reached comfort often say, “That won’t work, and here’s why.“  Those who have not tasted success and/or are not comfortable with who they are often say, “Well, that’s different.  I’ll try it.“  Almost invariably, they’ll find that something clicks for them.  The neat thing for me, the instructor, is often what clicks has nothing to do with what I was trying to teach.  I can’t explain how that works, but it’s fun and I take little credit for it.  The student, by investigating their own limits, discovers something quite new.  That is simply what happens when we discover ourselves.

Those who fight back frustrate us both.  Instead of trying to find something to learn, they spend time defending what works for them.  But what “works” may be just good, when great or The Best may be waiting.  I walk away from those encounters challenged to never accept good for myself.  When I’m being pushed by a differing view, I do not have to change my view.  But I’m cheating myself by not considering what I can learn from the new idea.

When faced with something that is uncomfortable, new, or even downright odd,

ask yourself, “What can I learn?”